“See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven” (Matthew 18:10-11).
After reading this verse in Matthew Chapter 18 one morning, I thought about what my psychologist had said to me during one of my first sessions. Although we had not known each other very long, he knew my story – growing up in an alcoholic family and managing bipolar disorder. He said it was a wonder that I had such a positive disposition and I didn’t have a horribly negative outlook on life. I told him it was a total God-thing.
Coming through to the other side of a childhood in an alcoholic family, I have always believed that somebody somewhere was praying for me or watching over me. As a result of those prayers, I held on to my faith in God even though the church had forsaken me during my foundational years. Due to the way I was treated by the people in the church, I could have easily walked away from my faith in God, forever.
The church of my youth was not a haven in the storm for an alcoholic family caught in the eye of a chaotic hurricane of addiction. During one of my father’s first of many hospitalizations, an elder of the church and extended family member found out that my father was an alcoholic. Prior to that hospitalization, my father had been a deacon in our church and a Sunday school teacher. That next Sunday, he was stripped of both positions. Instead of throwing my family a lifeline, that church turned their backs on us and sat back as we drowned one liter at a time on vodka and soda.
I had been acquainted with Matthew 18:10-11 before and had a framed copy of it on my classroom desk when I was a teacher. However, I never thought about this verse pertaining to myself. When I read about the angels seeing God’s face, I think about the pandemonium I had endured in an alcoholic family and how that first church I had been introduced to was not supportive at all. I realize that people are not perfect. When people are confronted with uncomfortable situations, sometimes they do not know what to do. They either do nothing at all or respond in extreme ways like this church did.
My walk with the Lord has been far from perfect. What is significant is that I have chosen to walk with Him and keep Him by my side all these years since I moved away from my family when I went to college. I am living proof of the validity of that verse in Matthew Chapter 18 and I believe my angel was talking to God about me all this time and watching over me.