When I have been in the valley of bipolar depression and surrounded on all sides by hills of anxiety and fear, I like to remember one of my favorite passages in scripture, “I lift my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, Maker of heaven and earth” (Psalm 121:1-2).
This verse comes alive to me every time the depression and the anxiety begin to swell. It is in those times that the valleys are as deep as they are wide and the hills are as tall as they are long. In the valley of depression, under the shadow of the hills of anxiety and fear, I must look for help, like the verse says in order to survive. I must remember that God is my help in times of trouble (Psalm 46:1). I can call out to Him and He will help me.
I have learned through my experiences with bipolar depression that my faith in God goes a long way in getting me through the valleys and seeing past the mountains. In Matthew 17:20, we read Jesus saying to his disciples “I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”
When bipolar depression hits me like a ton of bricks and it feels like I am moving through mud, it is difficult to do this thing called life on my own. It takes an enormous amount of faith on my part to be able to trust Him to carry me through every minute of every day. There is no way without the help of the Almighty God that I can be a wife, go to work, take care of my dogs, let alone take care of myself. Those things are sometimes my mountains that tower over me. Life gets that hard. However, over time I have grown in my faith in God and those mountains quake and move during those dark hours.
Our Savior says to tell that mountain “move” and it will move. When was the last time you mustered up a little bit of faith of your own? All you need is faith the size of a mustard seed and you can make your mountains move. Having a mustard-size faith in God, the Maker of heaven and earth can cause your mountains to move and fall at your feet.