Having rapid cycling bipolar, I am constantly cycling through something. The mood is like a pendulum and swings from one side to the other without any provocation. I would see hypomania and depression at great frequency throughout the following scenarios: whether I want to work or not; relationships; purchases; personal decisions; certain actions; and there are more. I will make up my mind that I love my job. I respect my boss for his vast wealth of knowledge. Then the cycle begins. It will either be the depression or the hypomania or both at the same time saying I hate my job.
I’ll give you another example of rapid cycling bipolar. I bought a 2014 sky-blue Mustang GT last year (this makes my second Mustang I have owned – I love American muscle cars!) I fell in love with “Frank”, yes I named my car. He has so much personality, he needed a name. So I named him Frank after “Ole Blue Eyes” Frank Sinatra. I loved driving it last summer and on into the fall rolling through the pretty landscapes splashed with fall colors. But then the rain, the snow and the ice came. And Frank stayed parked. My husband and I carpooled. It sucked. I missed Frank and driving fast. Then I started longing for my Lexus RX 350. It got me everywhere in the snow safely. I loved it! Guess who was going ‘bye, ‘bye for that cycle? Frank. So, the same thing happens, hypomania or depression or both cycles in and I change my mind again. When this cycle comes up, I learn to breathe, be patient and enjoy the fluffy white snow of the winter.
As you can see, for someone with rapid cycling bipolar disorder life can be a bit upside down at times. I liken it to a shifting floor under your feet. I am already unsteady on my feet because of the mental illness, then the cycling comes along and makes the ground beneath me so unsteady. The way I handle the upside down, shifting floor, unsteady feet is I go to Jesus. I pray. My prayers are often not elaborate prayers. They are cries for help. I attempt to feel His presence in my life so when the cycles come, I have a firm foundation to hang on to. Yeah, did you hear that? Jesus is a firm foundation. A rock. A fortress. He is not going to move. I might move one hundred times in all directions, but He stays put.
You may not have bipolar or a mental illness, but something has gotten you on unsteady feet. Won’t you call on Jesus? He is near to the broken hearted. He keeps your tears in a bottle.
If you have an experience with Jesus as your firm foundation, I would love to hear about it. Email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.